" I learned that it is the weak who are cruel , and that gentleness is to be expected only from the strong . Show me someone who has done something worthwhile, and I'll show you someone who has overcome adversity. "

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♥ Thursday, May 28, 2009

I feel like giving up , everything .



Having quite lots of fun today at school for the post exam activities .
I finally laughed out , from the bottom of my heart , not a fake laughing .
Thanks to all my classmates , especially bokmay & Kristine (:
Although the weather is so super hot , but im still having lots of fun .
Went back to class after the post exam activity , get back our report book .
You know , sigh , get 4 U , i cant believe i failed my english .
And all these 4 subjects are all over 40marks , which is nearly pass , but i just cant do it . ALL 4 subjects , over 40marks , why ?!
My mother called me , asked me about my results , when i told her that i falied my science because some of the test marks pull my SA marks down , and so i failed .
She's so disappointed , telling me she's wasting money on me , let me have tuition all this . No use at all , i know .
And after school , he called me up and asked me to meet him at concourse , yea , the bitch's DARDAR is complaining again , lame shyt .
Complaining that i spammed her blog , im not spamming , im just telling her that we wont spam anymore . Scared people spam jiu private blog , everytime like that .
My mood yesterday was so daddy-mummy down lahs , all because of leslie again .
Told me so many things , why this and that -.- Ah , whatever .
&' i realise that im getting closer and closer with Bokmay and Jane (:



Is not that i dont wanna answer your qns , is just that i dont know how to answer it .
Because for the every answer i gave , it will either hurt one of you .
Thats why i choose to say i dont know .
Its been so long that i've teared because of somebody told me about these kind of things .
And now my mother had given up on me , saying me wasting her money , nothing can cured me , lazy , hurt them , so stubborn , nobody wanna care for me , stupid and all stuffs .
Im crying so badly now , seriously badly , my cliques and boyf , had heard me cry when they called me . I just cant say anything out , not a single thing .
I only know how to cry , as some of you say , all i know is to cry , but nothing .
I dont want to cry too , but other than cry , what can i do ?
I know you all will say smth like try harder or EOY , but my MYE is alrd so sucky .
My mother scold me without even looking at my report book , and then scold like nobody business . I feel like venting all my anger out , telling my cliques how i feel , but why i just cant say anything out ?! I just kept crying and crying , non stop .
I feel like giving up , everything , i dont wanna live anymore .
I rather be animals than human , why must it be me ?!
I want freedom , im alrd 14 going 15 years old , i still cant have the thing i want .
I just want freedom , thats all .
Friends and relationship , both side , i had to take it all up . I know some of you will say give up on relationship , but you try , if you love a person , is so hard to give up , and its all too late .
Im not regreting having a relationship at all . Seriosuly no .
And studies , i cant do it , i've alrd tried my very best .
I dont mind people pushing blame on me , but i dont like people wronged me .
Always say i didnt do this and that when they never even really see it with their own eyes .
I wanna give up alrd , friends are cheering me up , telling me what to do or how to do , giving me advice and all that . Thanks alot , i really appreciate that , and i love all of you , my cliques &' boyf (:
Can i give up on everything i have now ?